WHAT'S IT ALL ABOUT?

We sped down a darkened highway on a moonlit night - two preteen children, a mom and a dad. Stars sparkled in the clear night sky against the pale smudge of the Milky Way.

“Just imagine,” I exclaimed. “We are looking at stars in billions of galaxies in a cosmos that has been expanding for nearly fourteen billion years. Our planet is less than a dust mote in a sunbeam when compared to all of this.”

We rode on in silence interrupted only by our daughter's sobbing in the back seat. Then it struck me. She was overwhelmed and frightened by the immensity of it all – by our seeming insignificance in the midst of this limitless expanse of space and time.

The memory haunts me still.

When I consider the things that consume our attention, the personal and global issues, I wonder, “What difference do these things make on a cosmic scale?”

Is there a positive direction to the evolution of the cosmos? Maybe. It's also possible that the grandeur I observed that night, is only a moment in an expanse of time and space; moving toward a point when all the stars burn out, leaving nothing but cold, dead darkness.

If this is the case, why not join the game played on our global stage: “Get what you can when you can. Whoever dies with the most toys wins?”

There is no way to know, in any objective sense, whether or not our lives have meaning. Sometimes it all seems fruitless. The things we value are overwhelmed by institutions, systems and powers beyond our control.

I yearn for the comfort afforded me by the God of my younger years. I wish I could continue to experience a benevolent being “up there” who loves, nurtures and protects me. I envy those for whom this is still a fact.

Then I remember that young girl sobbing in the back seat of our car so many years ago. I think of my little grandson now, so open and full of hope. I am aware of the little child who continues to live in me and in all the adults around me. He is part of my unconscious yearning for love and acceptance. We are all affected by these inner yearnings. We are like children on a play ground vying for attention and approval.

In spite of the unknowns and uncertainties of our times, I choose not to succumb to pessimism and cynicism. I continue on for the little ones, past, present, inner and outer. Yet, it is more than that.

I continue on because I experience a deep attachment, an unconditioned love, that goes beyond mere emotion. I may not feel the comfort of a father or mother “out there” as I did in the past, but I do experience a kind of knowing that is outside the box of my customary understanding. Through this knowing, I experience an existence filled with unexpected opportunities just waiting to be actualized.

I remember when I was the director of Madison-area Urban Ministry (MUM). There were times I wanted to engage someone of influence in the community. I knew I could come, hat in hand, to meet that person. Initially s/he would not listen to me. When I waited with expectancy, circumstances would often develop; and I could meet him/her on much sounder footing. The task was waiting, looking and expecting the opportunity to materialize.

I experience this when I am dealing with dilemmas in my life. If I wait and listen with expectancy, I often have a dream, hear a remark, or read something that reframes the issue in a new way. Because I am open and receptive, I notice these things when others may not.

Although my relationship with the mystery isn't as personal as in my youth, something is promoting wholeness.

We are part of a cosmos that was created in the big bang - stars, planets, black holes, dark matter, life and other mysteries beyond our present comprehension. Our growing awareness of ourselves, our consciousness, is part of a growing consciousness in the whole of the cosmos.

I am increasingly aware that this knowing that is deeper than emotion, this unconditioned love, connects me to all that is. It's as if I and the rest of the cosmos are part of a single organism.

The greater my awareness of this mystery, the more it beckons to me.

The stars in their galaxies continue their billion year transit through space and time. Our little planet continues to orbit a star on the outer edge of one small galaxy among billions of others. We are just a dust mote in a sunbeam when compared to this vastness..

Yet I am one with it all. I am connected to everything. This makes all the difference.

A JOURNEY TOWARD JERUSALEM

Have you ever been so committed to something or someone that you were willing to risk your life?

My wife and daughter were involved in a highway accident several years ago. Their car flipped end to end and rolled over. EMT's removed them from the vehicle and placed them on the grassy median with my unconscious daughter in my wife's arms. My wife prayed to God, “If one of us is to die, let it be me.”

There are moments when we are willing to risk our lives, out of love.

There are also times when people commit to premeditated risky or painful actions. I have a pastor friend whose son was suffering from kidney failure. Out of love, he underwent surgery to remove one of his organs to save his son.

Some folk commit their entire lives to challenging unjust societal structures for the sake of the wholeness and health of people. Many are these are celebrated publicly: Ruth Bader Ginsberg, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Rev. Billy Graham, César Chávez, Dom Hélder Pessoa Câmara, Gertrud Baer, Joan Baez, Helen Caldicott, Jimmy Carter, James Gareth Endicott, Leymah Gbowee, Kirthi Jayakumar, Wangari Maathai,  Elizabeth McAlister, Rigoberta Menchú, Óscar Romero, Pete Seeger, Nancy Shelley OAM, Ivan Supek, Evelyn Underhill, George Willoughby and Howard Zinn.ⁱ Millions of others are virtually unknown.

This is the season of Lent in the Christian calender. Lent commemorates the period of time in Jesus' life when he journeyed to Jerusalem to confront the Jewish leaders. He planned to warn them that their collusion with Rome would end in the destruction of Israel. He wanted them to experience the coming reign of God based on unconditional love. Jesus believed that this emerging reality had more staying power than the domination and violence of the Roman Empire.

Jesus knew that challenging the power structure of Israel and Rome would likely result in his execution. Yet he was so committed to his calling that he proceeded in spite of the risk. The Gospel of Luke puts it starkly in these words: “... he steadfastly set his face to go to Jerusalem”ⁱⁱ

Many Christians commemorate the beginning of the Lenten season (Ash Wednesday) by having ashes placed on their foreheads. This is symbolic of the ancient Jewish practice of repenting by dressing in sack cloth and sitting in ashes. Many Christians also give up something pleasurable (smoking, eating candy, eating red meat etc.) to remind themselves to focus on their shortcomings when compared to Jesus' life and teaching. This is indeed a helpful way to alter patterns of living that are destructive to a person's life and faith.

I recently had a conversation with a friend that broadened my understanding of Lent. When Jesus was alive, he didn't say, “If any want to become my followers, WORSHIP me.” He said, “If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and FOLLOW me..”ⁱⁱⁱ This advice is relevant for all of us. Whether you are religious in any sense or a non, it is insufficient just to glorify or worship those whom you admire. You need to follow them in the actions of your life.

It is in this spirit that I offer you a duel practice during this Lenten season. Spend time during the next few weeks repenting and reflecting on your short comings. This will help you get honest with yourself.

At the same time, consider the person who inspires you – if Jesus, then Jesus; if someone else, then someone else. Study how this person, like Jesus, “ steadfastly set their face to go to their Jerusalem.” In what ways were they so committed to their calling that they were willing to face danger to be true to this calling? Then ask, “How might I emulate this person's values and practices in my twenty-first century environment?” “In what ways am I being called to “steadfastly set my face toward my Jerusalem?”

As I asked myself this question, I recalled a memory of my son. My wife and I were traveling with him on a subway that was filled to capacity. As we moved to the back of the car, a couple of people offered us their seats. We said, “It's OK. We can stand.” Timothy said, “Take the seats mom and dad. You're old.”

That struck me. “I'm old.” I have been a leader, struggling for compassion and justice most of my life. As I steadfastly set my face to my Jerusalem, I need to acknowledge the fact that my generation needs to pass the torch to a younger generation. I have seen too many leaders hang on too long. This letting go of my role as leader and assuming the role of supporter, sage and consultant is as difficult for me as sacrificing myself in the struggle.

I still feel the calling and passion of my youth. I still have much to offer. Yet I must discern how I can best follow my calling at this time in my life. There is a dying in this as I move forward in my Lenten journey. This is my way of incarnating the unconditional love that flows through the cosmos.

We Christians, in particular, are quick to theologize about the incarnation of God through Jesus. This allows us to worship Jesus without recognizing that incarnation is an ongoing process. It's not a once-and-for-all thing. Jesus said that the Reign of God was present as well as becoming. This “becoming” applies to more than life after death. It is a present, evolving and cosmic process that involves all people. In a real sense, this is the message of all major religions and spiritual traditions.

This is where I place my hope. Even in the midst of the alienation and turmoil of our age, I have hope because “Unconditional love really exists in each of us. It is part of our deep inner being. It is not so much an active emotion as a state of being. It's not 'I love you' for this or that reason, not 'I love you if you love me.' It's love for no reason, love without an object.” (Ram Dass quote)

My hope is based on the fact that millions of people, known and unknown, are “steadfastly setting faces toward their Jerusalems.” You and I are privileged to be a part of this movement.

ihttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_peace_activists

iiLuke 9:51b (King James Version)

iiiLuke 9:23

THE MANY FACES OF LOVE

We recently celebrated Valentine's day, the day we give flowers, candy hearts, stuffed animals and beautiful cards to one another. We delight in love stories where the characters live happily ever after. We cherish joyful times with our family and friends. Our hearts melt in the presence of little children.

Yet love, real love, also causes pain. To love is to be vulnerable. When we love, we are no longer in control. We suffer loss.

I was reminded of this several days ago. I woke to find that Jean was not in bed. This is not unusual, as she rises before me and heads to a local pond where she sits in front of “Timothy's Tree” to read, think and take photos. Timothy, our son, died four years ago. We love him dearly.

This morning was different. As I climbed onto my exercise bike, I noticed that the house was dark. Jean usually turns on a kitchen light when she leaves. I called to her, but no response. Immediately fear kicked in. Maybe she had a medical emergency and was collapsed on the floor.

I hurried downstairs calling her name. Then I spotted the note she leaves for me when she departs. I heaved a sigh of relief and climbed back upstairs to continue my exercise.

I remember another time when I panicked like this. We were graduate students, living in St. Louis. Jean went grocery shopping one night and was delayed. This was before we had cell phones. I literally paced the apartment until she returned.

I love my wife, but I'm not good at telling her. I realize my love mainly at times when I'm afraid that I might lose her. This is certainly true with our son, Timothy. We realize how much we love him, now that he is gone.

Death is not the only loss we suffer in love. We suffer the pain of unfulfilled hopes and dreams. There is the agony of betrayal – being betrayed and betraying. We anguish over missed opportunities that are forever gone. There are the decisions made that one wishes one had made differently. We experience unforeseen events, the accidents that forever change things. There are the ruptures in relationships where love turns to hatred, anger and frustration over what might have been and can never be.

We love animals as well as well as people. Two little dogs filled our lives with joy. We had to euthanize each of them as they grew old and infirm. It was torture holding them as the poison was injected, and their little bodies went limp.

Some of us are pained by the loss of any kind of life. I remember biking one spring in Madison, when I approached an intersection with a stop sign. A baby robin was perched near the rear wheel of a car at that intersection. I raced toward the car waving my hand. The car moved forward crushing the little bird.

Another time, while driving on a local street, I saw a seagull flopping in the road. I jammed on my breaks, blocking traffic, and raced to pick up the injured bird. As I carried it from the road, it's struggling ceased. I placed it gently under some shrubs, its final resting place.

I grieve when I see trees dying near highways, killed by the excess salt spread in the winter. I grieve for forests destroyed by clear cutting and corn fields covered over by asphalt for shopping malls. I grieve for animals who are butchered under inhumane conditions by giant food conglomerates. I grieve for all plants and animals that suffer due to human carelessness and callousness.

Love connects us in many ways. I am connected to people who irritate me when I pray for my enemies. I have few warm feelings toward these people. I don't love them like I love family members and friends. I won't send them bouquets of hearts and flowers. Yet prayer alters my attitude toward them. They are no longer objects of hate or ridicule. I realize that we are similar in many respects. We are connected in our common humanity.

Most of us have been conditioned to experience love as personal, romantic and spiritual. There is nothing wrong with this. It's beautiful and important. But it is only part of the picture. There is a deeper dimension of love. It's not emotional. It's something more. Ram Dass described it this way, “Unconditional love really exists in each of us. It is part of our deep inner being. It is not so much an active emotion as a state of being. It's not 'I love you' for this or that reason, not 'I love you if you love me.' It's love for no reason, love without an object.” For me, this love involves a realization that I am part of the whole cosmos, and this cosmos is part of me. In this love, there is no more “we and they.” We are all one.

We need this dimension of love today as we are confronted with human tragedies on a massive scale. Ten countries face humanitarian catastrophe in 2019, due to armed conflicts, economic collapse and climate related events. These result in internal or external displacement (refugees). These countries include Yemen, the Democratic Republic of the Congo, South Sudan, Afghanistan, Venezuela, Central African Republic, Syria, Nigeria, Ethiopia, and Somalia. Around 40 million people have been displaced across the world, with the top 10 countries accounting for over half - or nearly 22 million - of those displacements. These 10 countries also account for at least 13 million refugees, 65 percent of the global total, plus an additional three million people who have fled Venezuela. According to the United Nations, nearly 132 million people in 42 countries around the world will need humanitarian assistance, including protection, in 2019.ⁱ

This is not all. Humankind faces the possibility of extinction due to two other crises. The first is climate change due to global warming. The second is the loss of biodiversity due to climate change and population increase. A major report produced by theWorld Wildlife Fund finds that the vast and growing consumption of food and resources by the global population is destroying the web of life. This web was billions of years in the making. It is the web upon which human society ultimately depends for clean air, water and everything else. Many scientists believe the world has begun a sixth mass extinction, the first to be caused by a species – Homo sapiens. Other recent analyses have revealed that humankind has destroyed 83% of all mammals and 50% of plants since the dawn of civilization. Even if the destruction were to end now, it would take 5-7 million years for the natural world to recover.^{ii iii}

When faced with statistics such as these, it is easy to feel overwhelmed by the sheer enormity of the issues. Even when we see graphic photos that grip us emotionally, we soon suffer from compassion fatigue because the pain of such horrendous suffering is too great to bear.

Our global cultures are awash in patterns of distrust, division, domination and violence. Life on our planet is threatened by global warming, overpopulation and diminishing biodiversity. Yet I still have hope. I have hope because everyday people are moved by unconditional love which is part of our deep inner being, love for no reason and love without an object.^iv This is the love that motivated Jesus as he spoke about the Kingdom or Reign of God.^v Founders of other religious/spiritual traditions stated this truth in similar ways.

We can observe this unconditional love in action if we just look for it. It was evident when Rep. Elijah Cummings recently concluded the House Oversight Committee's questioning of Michael Cohen with an impassioned plea for preservation of that which makes our democracy great.^vi

We observed it in June 2018 when Liz Theoharis and William Barber II reignited, the Poor People’s Campaign initiated by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.^vii

It was apparent in 2012 when Malala Yousafzai, age 15, was shot in the head by the Taliban in Pakistan. The assassination attempt was a response to her stand for the right of girls to gain an education after the Taliban had banned them from attending school. In 2014 she became the youngest ever Nobel Peace Prize laureate. Motivated by love, she leads pioneering change in attitudes towards women, children, inequality and education in Asian countries.^viii I am certain you can name others who behave in this way from your personal experience.

This is why I have hope. Everyday people are responding in unconditional love. Let us each heed this call that is part of our deep inner being. Rabindranath Tagore put it this way: “Love is the only reality and it is not a mere sentiment. It is the ultimate truth that lies at the heart of creation.”

The Patience of Ordinary Things^ix

by Pat Schneider

It is a kind of love, is it not?

How the cup holds the tea,

How the chair stands sturdy and foursquare,

How the floor receives the bottoms of shoes

Or toes. How soles of feet know

Where they’re supposed to be.

I’ve been thinking about the patience

Of ordinary things, how clothes

Wait respectfully in closets

And soap dries quietly in the dish,

And towels drink the wet

From the skin of the back.

And the lovely repetition of stairs.

And what is more generous than a window?

Another River: New and Selected Poems (Amherst Writers and Artists Press, 2005).

ihttps://www.aljazeera.com/indepth/inpictures/top-10-countries-risk-humanitarian-disaster-2019-181213184843061.html

iihttps://www.theguardian.com/environment/2018/oct/30/humanity-wiped-out-animals-since-1970-major-report-finds

iiihttps://www.theguardian.com/environment/2018/nov/03/stop-biodiversity-loss-or-we-could-face-our-own-extinction-warns-un

ivSee Ram Dass quote above.

vFor further discussion of this see Richard Rohr's new book, “The Universal Christ” at <https://store.cac.org/products/companion-guide-for-groups-the-universal-christvariant=21757908516948&_ga=2.220433560.1487970427.1551823633-1167299654.1551823633>

vihttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=72gy-LZ4UN0

viihttps://www.poorpeoplescampaign.org

viiihttps://charterforcompassion.org/women-justice-and-compassion/23-inspiring-women-fighting-for-women

ixThank you Bill Rettig for sharing this poem at the end of this reflection.

GO WHERE NO ONE HAS GONE BEFORE

Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its five-year mission: to explore strange new worlds. To seek out new life and new civilizations. To boldly go where no man (sic) has gone before!

When I hear or see this intro to Star Trek, it still sends shivers up and down my spine. “To go where no human being has ever gone before.”

What a thrilling prospect!

To be the first person to lay eyes on the bones of a prehistoric ancestor;

To make a scientific discovery that breaks new ground;

To engage in a relationship that opens new vistas in your life;

To see the world for the first time when you were blind from birth;

To discover unimagined potentials in yourself.

This is the allure of vacation trips to exotic places. We imagine ourselves sitting on a sunlit beach by the ocean in Hawaii or skiing down mountain trails in the Alps. Each offers the opportunity to leave the sometimes drab regularity of our day-to-day lives and to experience something new. Most of us can't afford to spice up our lives regularly with these extravagances. For many of us, even a single “trip of a life-time” is out of the question.

I sometimes fantasize about taking such a trip to relieve the boredom in my life. Even in my fantasies, I know that the physical experience alone is not sufficient. It's the imagining, the anticipation, and the remembering that makes it special. It's the emotional, psychological, spiritual dimensions of the trip that count.

I remember when we adopted our 5 week old son, Timothy. I was a grad student, tired and pushing. It was three days after the first moon landing. We arrived at the adoption agency and were ushered into a small room with a crib. Jean looked down at the baby and said, “Hi Timothy.” Timothy smiled. Our hearts melted. My life lit up. 

The same was true when are daughter, Rebecca, was born to us a year later. I was present at her birth. Once again my life lit up. 

I am a now a grandfather, living near my daughter and grandson. As with years ago, my life lights up when I am with them. 

It isn't “a once in a life-time excursion” that lifts me out of the mundane. It is the inner anticipation, excitement, yearning and emotion that make these experiences worthwhile. Even when I am sitting in a room with my grandson, I am “exploring strange new worlds, seeking out new life, and boldly going where no one has gone before.”

I realize that my experiment in praying for my enemies was also a journey into the unknown. I started out saying, “Bless A; Bless B; etc. Soon the act was more than a mechanical recitation. It was suffused with a powerful yearning that my enemies and I could be part of something greater than our own set of desires and fears. 

I was no longer troubled by questions like;

                             To Whom or What am I praying?

                             What should I pray for?

                             Should I have an agenda as I pray for my enemies?

My process of “prayer” morphed into engaging something mysterious that is deep in me and also “out there.” It is almost as if I am in touch with a deep yearning of the cosmos. It's not something I can control. It's more like something of which I become a part.

Now when I pray, I am gripped less often by the sense that I am seeking power or insights to help me deal with specific problems. I feel strangely comfortable that I will be able to discern how I can most effectively contribute. It's no longer “me against the world.” Nor is it “me against my enemies.” I am engaged in something greater. 

My experience is similar to that described in “The Cloud of Unknowing” written by an early mystic.ⁱ  The author asserts: "We can not think our way to God. He can be loved but not thought. So, we dwell in a not-knowing (or claiming to know more than we possibly can) of God.” 

This is not a purely emotional experience. My thinking self is still engaged. It's just that ideas and concepts no longer dominate my engagement. As with my experience of adopting of our son, the birth of our daughter and time with my grandson, I am part of something akin to love. Just as the ancient mystic used the word “God” to allude to something he experienced as a “cloud of unknowing,” I am using “energy of the cosmos” to allude to what I am experiencing.

This takes me back to the beginning of this reflection. Physical experiences alone can't free us from the mundane. It's what's on the inside that gives meaning. When we are in touch with this dimension of life, even everyday experiences can be adventures of discovery.

Unfortunately, we live in a culture that focuses primarily on the external. This has dulled our consciousness. We have become automatons conditioned by cultural expectations. We are bombarded with ads that urge us to purchase goods and services intended to enhance our creature comfort. We are told we will have more control of our life if we hire certain consultants or use specific products. Politicians incite fear of certain individuals or groups to promote their programs.

I, like you, am influenced by these societal pressures: I exercise every morning, partly to enhance my health and partly because I envy younger people who are in good physical shape. I read voraciously, partly because it feeds my curiosity and partly because I want to compete with people who are better informed. I push myself, partly because I want to live a full, healthy life and partly to keep up with the competition. I even catch myself watching the clock during meditation rather than flowing with the experience.

We all have a tremendous need to grow our interior lives; our consciousness. Only in this way will we appreciate life, in all of its mundane aspects, as truly enlivening. In this way, we can we live proactively, inspired by goals that transcend the negativity of our complex and dangerous times. 

The writer of “The Cloud of Unknowing” gives this advice to engage the cosmic mystery, to grow in greater consciousness. 

For He (God or the cosmic mystery) can well be loved, but he cannot be thought. By love he can be grasped and held, but by thought, neither grasped nor held. And therefore, though it may be good at times to think specifically of the kindness and excellence of God, and though this may be a light and a part of contemplation, all the same, in the work of contemplation itself, it must be cast down and covered with a cloud of forgetting. And you must step above it stoutly but deftly, with a devout and delightful stirring of love, and struggle to pierce that darkness above you; and beat on that thick cloud of unknowing with a sharp dart of longing love, and do not give up, whatever happens."[6]ⁱⁱ

It doesn't require a Herculean act of will power to grow in consciousness through the power of love. Quite the opposite. One needs to follow the deep yearning to love and to be loved - a yearning that is common to us all. This feels risky in our externalized and goal oriented culture.  So it is difficult to follow this yearning. 

I experienced this when we adopted our son and when our daughter was born.  My life lit up, but I couldn't appreciate the gift in this. I was so consumed by the pressures of my studies that I repressed the yearnings of my heart. It is only now, through my daughter and grandson, that I finally appreciate this gift in me. 

It's not that I was totally unappreciative earlier in my life. It's just that engaging the cosmic mystery in the “Cloud of Unknowing” is a gradual process. It involves a metamorphosis, a transformation of the way we view the world. When guided by a deeper consciousness, we begin to realize that this is a major reorientation, “it's more WE then ME.” 

I discovered, but wasn't truly appreciative of this, when I was director of Madison-Area Urban Ministry. We engaged community conflicts looking for win-win rather win-lose options. We were often able to promote “out of the box” strategies that reduced injustices while also changing people's perceptions of one another. I now realize that Dr. MLK was right when he reiterated the advice given by the writer of the “Cloud of Unknowing. “Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy to a friend.” 

I would add, “Love is the only force capable of transforming our consciousness of what it means to be authentically human.” We have the potential, individually and collectively, to move to a deeper level of conscious. This will allow us to experience our daily lives in a new light. We are part of a cosmic flow that gives us the potential to become more than we ever imagined.

We, like the women and men of the starship Enterprise, are on a mission: to explore strange new worlds. To seek out new life and new civilizations. To boldly go where no one has gone before!

Wild Geese You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine. Meanwhile the world goes on. Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes, over the prairies and the deep trees, the mountains and the rivers. Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air, are heading home again. Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, the world offers itself to your imagination, calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting over and over announcing your place in the family of things. -Mary Oliver, Dream Work (Atlantic Monthly Press)

i  https://www.americamagazine.org/content/all-things/reading-spiritual-classic-cloud-unknowing

ii https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Cloud_of_Unknowing

WEIRD ENERGY: PART 2

My eighty-day practice of praying for my enemies was interrupted at the end of 2018. While in Minnesota visiting relatives, I landed in the hospital suffering from congestive heart failure. This incident reminded me that, even when I am committed to a course of action, I may not be able to follow through. I am not in control of my life. 

The simple fact, that we can't control our circumstances, no matter how hard we try, is key to engaging the weird energy that I began exploring in my last post.ⁱ

Although I know I won't live forever, I have not really faced the fact of my dying.

I am going to die.

You are going to die.

Even the richest most powerful people in the world are going to die.

My children are going to die.

Your children are going to die.

All of the descendants of all of the people on earth are going to die.

There is something deep in our psyches that resists death. This elemental urge is a necessary condition for the survival of all living things. Without this drive, life would not have emerged and sustained itself on our planet. This elemental urge serves us well in the moment. When we are attacked, we fight or flee from the danger.

With the rise of consciousness, there are complications. We humans are now able to imagine an existence in the future. We are able to envision future dangers We are able to develop strategies in the present to eliminate these anticipated threats.

Unfortunately, humankind is still tribal at its core. The US develops strategies to prevent Russia or China from surpassing us in technology, weapons production and economic growth. At a more parochial level, we develop strategies to prevent immigrants from residing in our country. More parochial still, members of the dominant culture develop policies to maintain their dominance over less dominant groups. These groups are often defined by race, religion, country of origin, or sexual orientation. They are labeled as undesirable and a threat to the society. In addition to the obvious moral shortcomings of such strategies, the threats they identify are transient and short term. 

When envisioning the future we need to examine evolving threats on a much broader scale and over much longer timelines. Even now, we seem unable to address long term threats to our existence. These threats include global warming, extinction of animal and plant species and deterioration of religious/moral structures, to name a few.

This tendency to view only our short term future is further exacerbated by people who manipulate our fears of domination and violence for their own ends. These tactics transform our primitive fight or flight response into a collective belief that violence and domination are the only means to preserve ourselves and our tribe.

This worldview is insidious at a deeper level. It tempts us to frame our existence exclusively in terms of physical survival. Corporations and universities are rewarded when they focus their efforts on narrowly defined goals. This stifles endeavors, like space exploration, since such endeavors are motivated purely by curiosity without any obvious benefits. 

This worldview also demeans the arts which somehow feed the human spirit without any material benefits.

Bret Stephens wrote an opinion piece in a recent New York Times, titled “Useless Knowledge Begets New Horizons.”ⁱⁱIn it he expresses concern about current strategies that sacrifice creativity for expedience. He fears that this focus will limit the freedom to create, which will diminish the creative genius of democracy. He writes: 

“.. freedom is the license the roving mind requires to go down any path it chooses and go as far as the paths may lead. This is how fundamental discoveries a.k.a., “useless knowledge” — are usually made: not so much by hunting for something specific, but by wandering with an interested eye amid the unknown. It’s also how countries attract and cultivate genius — by protecting a space of unlimited intellectual permission, regardless of outcome.”

Stephens credits Abraham Flexner for having this insight decades ago, writing, “In October 1939, as Hitler, Mussolini and Stalin were plunging the world into war, an American educational reformer named Abraham Flexner published an essay in Harper’s magazine under the marvelous title, “The Usefulness of Useless Knowledge.”ⁱⁱⁱHe then quotes Flexner who wrote: 

“From a practical point of view, intellectual and spiritual life is, on the surface, a useless form of activity, in which men (sic) indulge because they procure for themselves greater satisfactions than are otherwise obtainable. In this paper I shall concern myself with the question of the extent to which the pursuit of these useless satisfactions proves unexpectedly the source from which un-dreamed-of utility is derived........ I sometimes wonderwhether our conception of what is useful may not have become too narrow to be adequate to the roaming and capricious possibilities of the human spirit.” 

Here's where my brush with mortality is important. I was confronted by the fact that life, all life, has an end point. All people, including my enemies, are dealing with this reality. 

We can “eat, drink and make merry” as a way of living. But just like Mr. Scrooge in the “Christmas Carol,” the specter of death haunts us in the depths of our psyches. As with Mr. Scrooge, our instinct to protect ourselves and our tribe, carries with it a powerful desire to be in relation with other members of our tribe. 

When dealing with the real possibility of dying, we realize that money and power are not the highest priority. This is why people are willing to spend a fortune to delay death. When the prospect of death is imminent, we realize that the love and support of friends is of highest value. Unfortunately, many of us arrive at the moment without having engaged this reality adequately.

This is where my experiment in praying for enemies is so helpful. It allows me to engage these people in all their complexity.At their core, most of my enemies are no different from myself. The major difference is that they wield power. The old statement that power corrupts is very apt in this context. Most of us, if placed in positions of power, would be tempted to behave in a similar way. On a smaller scale, we often behave this way in our relations with others. 

What is true of us personally is equally true of humankind.For the first time in recorded history, our species has the technological capability of affecting the basic dynamics of our global environment. 

Our species is a bit like a precocious teenager who has exceptional scientific knowledge and skill but little wisdom. S/he can use her/his resources to dominate and control others, or s/he can teach others so they too will possess this knowledge and skill. We, like the hypothetical teenager, must choose how we will proceed which road we will travel. 

The first road is wide and easy. This is the road of domination and violence. It is conditioned by our primitive flight or flight response and is generally assumed to be the only effective way to proceed. This road offers some short term benefits but, ultimately leads to destruction. It is destructive within families; particularly in times of distress, like divorce or death of a parent. One only has to look at our national political environment to see how destructive this dynamic is within nations. On a global scale, this dynamic is degrading the ecosystem of our planet. This road also degrades characteristics we value as humans – curiosity, creativity, humor, artistic sensitivity and compassion.

The second road is narrow and difficult. Few travel this road as it runs counter to the generally accepted wisdom of our culture. It runs counter to our primitive fight or flight response. It feels risky and vulnerable. This is the road ofdeveloping compassion for all sentient beings – friends, enemies, plants and animals. This is the road of expanded consciousness. 

The motivation to follow this road may begin with the rational knowledge that the old ways aren't working. This knowledge will not sustain the journey. My eighty days of praying for my enemies put me in touch with a weird energy that engages something deeper than my survival instincts. It put me in touch with a powerful yearning for wholeness. This yearning reaches toward the future with hope rather than fearfully reacting to enemies and dangers of the past.

I continue to participate in a supportive faith community. I do so, not because of the moral mandates of my religious tradition. I participate because this community helps me engage a deep yearning to become my authentic self, less conditioned by what others think of me. As I proceed on this journey toward authentic selfhood, I am increasingly aware that I am intimately connected to all other human beings. This allows me to 

grow in the ability to love others, including my enemies. I feel less isolated and alone, less controlled by my fears and anxieties. This road helps me realize that I am an integral part of the ever expanding flow of the cosmos.

I need to reiterate here what I said in my last reflection.^ivThe love of enemies to which I am referring is a tough love. I continue to hold my adversaries accountable for their actions even while recognizing that we are part of a larger cosmic flow. This tough love ironically gives rise to a kind of objectivity that is free of the desire to seek revenge. This is a love that serves a higher purpose than my own immediate wants and needs. This is what was meant when civil rights leaders in the 1960's urged non-violent protestors to “keep their eyes on the prize.”

I don't know how you resist the primitive urge to control and dominate others, but I do know that resistance alone is not enough. It is necessary for each of us to grow in consciousness of our authentic humanity.

I urge you to pursue “useless knowledge.”Let your curiosity lead you into new ways of experiencing life. Take time for silence. Listen to beautiful music. Immerse yourself in beauty of all kinds. Share stories with others of your past, your hopes and your dreams. Listen to children. Pray for your enemies. Participate in communities that fill you with hope and joy.

Each of us is much more than we think we are. We just need to open ourselves to the cosmic invitation to fulfill our potential.

“To love another human in all of her splendor and imperfect perfection, 

it is a magnificent task…tremendous and foolish and human.” 

-Louise Erdrich, The Last Report on the Miracles at Little No Horse

ihttps://drchuckpfeifer.blogspot.com/2018/12/weird-energy.html

iihttps://www.nytimes.com/2019/01/03/opinion/new-horizons-ultima-thule-mission.html

iiihttps://library.ias.edu/files/UsefulnessHarpers.pdf

ivSee reference (i) above.